If there is a God, then why did he or she put me on this Earth to be in such agony and have the inability to find an identity that I am comfortable with?
Questioning the meaning of it all
There is a force in the universe that caused the creation of the world and man and the other sentient beings. Whatever you call that force, it has done nothing beyond placing you on this Earth. It does not control what happens to you nor does it change things in answer to your prayers.
Suffering is universal, and lack of self-knowledge is universal, because as a monk once said to me, it’s just the way it is. The ego-mind, which is solely a property of man because of his developed brain, reacts to the insecurity we are faced with almost from the moment of birth and develops patterns of thought and emotion that causes us suffering.
But the ego-mind is not our true self. Our true self is our heart, our Buddha/divine essence. And our heart is life, love, faith, trust, compassion, humility, gratefulness, joy, contentment, strength, courage, and wisdom.
The serenity prayer says, “Lord, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (which is the way things are right now) and the courage to change the things I can (which is how I relate to myself and the world around me . . .. the thoughts i think, the words I speak, the actions i take).
What you have to do to end your suffering, discover your true identity, is to free yourself from the control of your ego-mind and reconnect with your true self, your heart. This is a challenging task requiring courage, discipline and patience for the power of your ego-mind over you is great. But the path is clear.
For help in walking the path try watching the video series, "Coming Home," which you can access from this website. Also browse the blog posts and perhaps read the book, How To Find inner Peace,
May you find peace and happiness.