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A Simpler Path to Experiencing Joy

5/25/2018

As you know from previous posts, I have been working with my inner child, healing it from the wounds it suffered. A friend of mine recently said to me that you have to do more than visit your inner child in the past and comfort him, be there for him. Your inner child is alive in you now and has needs. You need to parent him now; you have a symbiotic relationship. So ask you inner child what he wants for himself and how you can help him.

I did that. And the answer I received was very simple and straight-forward. My inner child said that he wants to experience joy. And for him to experience joy, I need to experience joy. And to experience joy, I need to be free of thought … emotions, judgments, cravings, attachments, and the eternal “what ifs?”.

This message was revelatory for me. I had always said that I want to be free of suffering and so I need to turn my will and my life over to the care of my true Buddha self. My healed inner child was saying that he wants to experience joy and so needs to be free of thought.

These are two sides of the same coin. But as the days pass, I am finding a big difference in their implementation. What my inner child wants seems easier, more natural. I’m not trying to free myself from something; I just want to experience what’s already there. Also, it seems easier to be aware when you are not experiencing joy than when you are experiencing low-level suffering. Finally, there is something very moving to hear your inner child say that it wants to experience joy; it is very motivating; you want to be there for your inner child.

And I am finding that being free of thought is simpler than turning my will and my life over to the care of my true self. First, there is no push-back. When I say I want to turn my will over to my true Buddha self or surrender my ego to it, that is threatening to my ego. But when I just don’t let thoughts invade my mental space, that seems to meet with no resistance.

Second, it’s straight-forward. There is no question of, “how”. I just say “no” to any thought or emotion that starts arising because I know it will interfere with my experiencing joy and happiness at that moment. Again, as I’ve stated in previous posts, being free of thought does not mean that I am not discerning. I am very aware of the situation I am in; I just don’t apply the ego-mind’s labels to it; I experience it directly with dispassion.

To put this into practice, it helps to take time throughout the day to do things for the pure joy of doing them, no other motive; whether it’s being in nature, going for a walk, listening to music; reading a good book. It also means that when I am doing things that move my life forward, I do them without emotion or labels or what ifs.

Many years ago, a monk told me, “Take joy in each moment, in everything you do.” I finally understand how, practically, to experience life in that way. It does not mean finding joy in the moment or the things I do, because it’s there. No effort is required. It just means being free of thought. When not weighed down by thought, my inherent joy will rise to the surface naturally.

At its core, what I just described is no different than knowing that what’s most important to you is peace and happiness and not allowing anything to interfere with that. (See my post, “What Is Most Important To You?”) And yet I am finding this message from my inner child to be even more powerful and easier to implement.

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Soul, True Self, and Ego-Mind

5/19/2018

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The soul features prominently in much spiritual writing. It is central to all three Abrahamic faiths, as it is to Hindu teaching. In Buddhism, the existence of “soul” has been confused because of the Buddha’s supposed teaching of “no self.” (See post referred to below.) Some lineages thus believe there is no soul; others do.

For those religions that believe in a soul, much spiritual writing defines it as the very essence of man. In many one speaks of the soul leaving the body at death. In Hinduism and those Buddhist lineages that believe in soul, one speaks of its reincarnation. But what the soul actually is and where it is to be found is a source of varied opinion.

In my earlier writing, The Self in No Self, I noted that what I termed our unborn spirit, our elemental nature … or what people would often call temperament … was part of our true Buddha nature. It was something that made one uniquely who he is, from birth, and yet because of his Buddha nature, he was at the same time one with all people.

Our unborn spirit does not separate us from each other, while still making us unique. That sounds like an oxymoron, but it isn’t. It is the feelings and perceptions of the ego-mind … thoughts … that separate us from others and is the source of selfish action and our suffering. This is the teaching of The Heart Sutra; this is perfected wisdom. Our unborn spirit, our elemental nature poses no barrier to selfless behavior because it is not composed of thought.

What I referred to as man’s unborn spirit, his elemental nature is what is more usually referred to as his soul. It is not of dependent origination. Whether the soul is part of our Buddha nature or an adjunct is, as the Pennsylvania Dutch say, “no never mind.” It is of no consequence.

The point I want to make here, as I did in my book, The Self in No Self, as well as in my post, “The Misleading Teaching of No Self,” is that the individuality of each person is not inconsistent with the Buddha dharma. The Dalai Lama and Thich Nhat Hanh are both individuals; they are not clones. The Buddha never taught that there is no self; what he taught was that the ego is “not self.” (See my post referred to.)

It is the ego-mind that develops within us and is of dependent origination that separates us from others and is the source of our samsara. That is what the Buddha defined as “not self.” It is from our ego-mind that we must free ourselves. Our individuality, our unborn spirit, our elemental nature … our soul … is part of our true self. It, together with our true Buddha nature, is thus the very essence of man.

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Peace and Happiness Is Your Birthright

5/12/2018

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Many readers will find this an odd statement, as they have rarely experienced true peace and happiness in their life. Indeed, we are taught that suffering is universal, so how can peace and happiness be our birthright?

It is our birthright because each of us is born with the true Buddha nature intact within us. And since peace and happiness is the hallmark of Buddha nature, that is our birthright.

However, almost from the moment of birth (and indeed, often while still in the womb) we do not receive the spiritual nourishment we need and are instead subjected to life experiences which cause us pain. Parents do the best they can, but a parent’s love and attention rarely meets a baby’s need, so great is it and so occupied with their own issues and lives are parents. Although toddlers are remarkably resilient, around age 3 those hurts start becoming calcified as the ego-mind forms, creates negative labels to describe our experiences, and develops emotional reactions to them.

In this way, our Buddha nature is similar to the body, which is also born intact but is weak and needs nourishment to grow and strengthen. Most babies, except those born into extreme poverty, receive the physical nutrition they need. But our Buddha nature does not receive the spiritual nourishment it needs and is instead overwhelmed by negative life experiences that create the darkness of the ego-mind. And so our life of samsara begins.

But regardless how far our Buddha nature has been buried under the detritus of life, it is important in walking the path to know that our Buddha nature is still there, intact. And in fact to be able to discern moments in our life when that nature has spoken to us. (Whenever you’ve had an internal debate between what is often referred to as the “good” and “bad” you over how to respond to something, the “good” you is your Buddha nature speaking.)

So when we work to discover our true self, we are not looking to create something new, we are trying to reconnect with that self that has always been within us since the moment of our birth. To reconnect with our Buddha nature that is peace and happiness.

And when we have reclaimed our true self and are at peace and happy, we will be filled with joy and wonder. For that is our natural state when we are free of the ego-mind’s thoughts.

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Walking the Path - It’s a Lot of Work, but It’s Well Worth It

5/6/2018

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There are many challenges in walking the path, whether one is relatively new to Buddhist practice or someone who’s been at it for 25 years, such as myself. The challenges come from two directions. The first is the world around us. Every day, we experience things which can be a catalyst for us to react through the emotions and judgments of our ego-mind.

The second is the ego-mind itself. Until you turn your will and your life over to the care of your true Buddha nature, your ego-mind will generally control your reactions to most experiences, even as you are walking the path. Thus while you will have extended periods of calm and clarity resulting from your practice, you still will frequently experience the samsara of fear and craving.

When you have turned your will and your life over to the care of your true Buddha nature, as I have, you will for the most part not react with emotion or judgmentally to things. You will be at peace, not agitated. But your ego-mind will still assert itself, mainly regarding “minor” things that you don’t notice, for example your overall ambience. And those minor things are enough to put you in a blah space rather than a joyful one.

And so, every morning when I meditate, I go to my heart, release all desires, release all attachments, and embrace all aspects of my being and experience. Then throughout the day, I try to be in touch with the positive energy in my heart and let that energy flow outward, and to experience things directly through my senses.

But each day, without fail, I become distracted at some point by the events of the day and so I am not present; at that point my ego-mind senses an opportunity to assert itself and control me. Until such moment when I am aware of what is happening and I redirect myself to my heart by chanting or conjuring up my smiling toddler.

To an observer or a novice, the reaction on reading this may be, “Why bother?” Let me tell you why. Before I walked the path, I was beset by endless suffering, not just a case of the blahs. I no longer suffer; nothing I experience agitates me or disturbs me. I have released all desires and attachments. So while I am not totally free of the grip of my ego-mind, relatively speaking my life today is a walk in the park.

Yes, it requires constant work and discipline. But the reward is a state of almost consistent peace and frequent experiences of joy and happiness, both from offering others joy and just experiencing what the present moment offers. I’ll take it.

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