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The Stages of Acceptance

12/30/2012

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When one realizes that if you truly want peace and contentment that there is no option other than accepting yourself, your life, and the world around you as being exactly the way it is, it is for most of us a very painful realization.  Despite understanding at some level the good that will come of acceptance, giving up all our desires ... what we think of as being totally legitimate, normal desires, despite the fact that they are cravings and unskillful because of our lack of equanimity ... as well as our view of ourselves and the world around us puts one in a state of grief.  

And as we grieve for the loss of all those things that seemed to give our life purpose and hope, our ego-mind grasps and fights, sending us through stages much like the five stages of grief identified by Kübler-Ross.  The stages of acceptance are:  bargaining, anger, resignation/depression, and relief/acceptance.

Bargaining:  Despite our realization that acceptance is necessary, we still push back against it and try to bargain for something that is more acceptable to us.  Whether it’s just wanting to keep a few key desires, or saying, “ok, I accept the way things are but can’t I still have my desires if I accept,” we try to bargain our way out of true and total acceptance.


But with this as with other things, half-measures don’t work.  One craving or strongly-held opinion is enough to disturb your equanimity and rent your peace and contentment to shreds.  While, as I have written, one can have skillful desires when you have achieved a base of equanimity, that requires true acceptance, not just mouthing the words.  And because our cravings are really addictions, we have to deal with them the same way one would in a 12-step program.  They must be put aside until such time as we can truly say that we accept ourselves and the world around us.  Acceptance needs to be given the space the take root. 

Anger:  When we realize that the bargains we try and strike don’t work, in that we continue to suffer greatly from the frustration that comes from our desires not being fulfilled or from the opinions we hold dear,  we are filled with anger.  “Why can’t I have desires like everyone else?”  “What have I done to deserve this?” “If I have no reason to hope, I may as well die.”  

Because the habit-energies of our cravings and opinions have determined the course of much of our lives, and because we feel that how we act is no different from others in our peer group and indeed is often supported and even promoted by our mass culture, we experience great anger at having to relinquish what we hold so dear and what we feel is so central to our potential happiness, even as it causes us unending frustration and pain.  This anger can often be an erupting fury, causing us to say things which are cruel to ourselves and others.

Resignation/Depression:  One can spend quite an extended time going back and forth between the bargaining and anger stages of acceptance.  But eventually, the mounting evidence of the effect of our cravings and opinions becomes inescapable, even to us, and we see no other option if we truly want peace and contentment.  This leads to the next stage, which is resignation and often depression.

When we become resigned to the idea that we must let go of most of what has driven us, rather than immediately experiencing the relief that comes from being free of our cravings and opinions, our ego-mind pouts and the result is often a mild form of depression.  This is the ego’s last ditch effort to keep us tethered to our old ways.  This can be a terrible period of time, as depression or lethargy, while quiet, is in its own way just as destructive as anger.

Relief/Acceptance:  At some point during the quiet of the resignation phase, you begin to see clearly during your meditations that you actually feel relief at not being driven by your desires, that you haven’t felt as content and at peace since you can remember.  It’s like being on vacation.  Your ego-mind, however, argues that it’s a bummer, not being able to do what you want to do.  

But then you finally realize that it’s not “you” who wants to do these things; you want peace and contentment, and you have finally achieved that by accepting yourself and the world around you.  At this point you throw off the feelings of resignation or depression caused by your ego and embrace your new freedom from cravings and opinions.  You are at peace with yourself and the world around you.

Once you have arrived at this stage, it is important to deepen the roots of your acceptance.  That means not entertaining any desires, even those that are in keeping with the Five Precepts, because your ego will grab ahold of them and throw you off your equanimity.  Give it time.  When you feel secure in your acceptance, that you are able to practice non-attachment, then you can entertain some skillful desires.  But be aware; at the first sign of frustration, it means your ego has breached your equanimity.  You must either stop and let your ego subside and your non-attachment return or if that does not work you must let your desires go again.

If you truly want peace and contentment there is a price attached to it ... and that price is accepting yourself, your life, and the world around you as being exactly the way it is.  There is no other way.


Another lesson in practical Buddhism.
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Turning Your Will Over to Your True Buddha Nature

12/20/2012

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Recently, a friend shared with me a thought he had while meditating.  He said that there’s no way to sort through all the issues that come up in his mind; his ego-mind won’t allow him any consistent clarity,  And so he said he decided that he needed to take a back seat in the process of his spiritual development and let Arjuna (he’s reading a Hindu text) take care of things.  

When his words came to me while I was meditating the next morning, I realized something that had been missing from my writing.  What my friend was doing is a core step in all 12-step programs ... turning your will and your life over to your higher power, realizing that only it can bring you peace.  Your higher power can be Arjuna, as in his case, or your true Buddha nature, or whatever.  The point is that there is an internal spiritual power within us that can lead us out of samsara if we only allow it to.

In the teaching I’ve received and my writings, the ultimate key has been to surrender your ego to your true Buddha nature.  As stated, that is a very willful act.  And as I know from my 12-step program background, addiction is self-will run riot.  I have written that our cravings are basically addictions.  And so, for example, in order to give acceptance a chance to take root, we need to do what is taught in 12-step programs and forego all desires until we can say that we truly accept our lives and ourselves as we are.  Then, as I’ve written, we can have skillful desires.  (See any of my books, but especially The Self in No Self.)

And so the wisdom of 12-step programs needs to be incorporated in the Fourfold Path to Freedom (see the above-referenced book) as well.  When we surrender our ego to our true Buddha nature, what we are doing is taking a back seat and turning our will and our lives over to our true Buddha nature.  That still is an act of will and our ego will fight mightily against it, but it is far less willful or confrontational than surrender.  

Perhaps of even greater impact, surrendering your ego is a scary concept.  The monk from whom I received this teaching said after we were working on this for a while that while we had come far, we were still standing on the precipice.  We had not jumped off it into the land of nirvana because we were scared of the unknown.  And how right he was.  

By incorporating the concept of turning our will and our lives over to our true Buddha nature, it turns the surrender of our ego into a warm and comforting act for we know we have nothing to fear from putting our lives in the hands of our true Buddha nature.  This may all seem like semantics, a distinction without a difference, but the words we speak or think, the approach we take, can make a significant difference in our overcoming the barriers to making further progress on the path.  This is an important addendum to my previous writings.

It took me years of practice after receiving this teaching on surrender to actually be able to surrender my ego to my true Buddha nature.  Interestingly, the final step came during an at-home 4-week retreat that I did (promoted by Tricycle magazine) which culminated in a day-long total immersion in my spirituality.  I realize now that the reason why the retreat had such an impact was that in addition to going deeper into my meditation, that final day was in effect turning my will and my life over to my true Buddha nature.  I just hadn’t thought of it in those terms before.  In the future, part of my practice will be spending one day each week immersed in my spirituality and meditation

And so the reason why it took so long, besides the craftiness and strength of my ego-mind, was both that I was approaching this as a willful act as opposed to just turning my will over to my true Buddha nature and that the concept of surrender and jumping off the precipice was scary.  Without any question in my mind, combining these two thoughts as I have now suggested is an improved teaching.

What also makes it a more powerful teaching is that it not just explicitly acknowledges ones belief that your true Buddha nature exists but that only it can bring you peace.  I have written that belief in the teachings of the Buddha is the cornerstone on which all progress on the path rests.  Without that belief there is nothing.  

And so I modify my teaching on The Fourfold Path to Freedom:

Understanding that all things are impermanent and   

   changeable.
Understanding that all our perceptions have no             inherent nature, they are just a product of our             mind,
 and that they are the direct cause of our           suffering.
Practicing the Six Paramitas.
Surrendering our ego to our true Buddha nature, 

   turning our will and our lives over to the care of 
   our true Buddha nature.

Another lesson in practical Buddhism.
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Yet Another Past Attachment

12/15/2012

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In a previous post, I used an example of my ego arising in its “fixer” habit-energy and discussed how I needed to be aware when this habit-energy rises so that I can say, “no,” to it as I do in other instances and let it subside.  The next morning while I was meditating, however, I realized a further aspect of this experience ... my attachment to some past experiences.

As a general matter, I am no longer a creature of my past experiences.  I have freed myself from the past, from my attachments and unskillful desires.  I experience things generally without the intervention of thought.  I have surrendered my ego to my true Buddha nature.  

But just as I realized about a year ago that while I was at one with the world at large, I was not at one with myself ... I had not read the teaching of the Heart Sutra as applying to my experience of myself! ... I realized that morning that I was not at one with people with whom I have a history, such as friends and family.  Instead, I relate to them based on past experiences; those perceptions/labels intervene and impact what I say and do regarding them.  

This is just one more example of how, regardless how advanced one is in ones practice (unless one is enlightened), our past influences our actions at times without our awareness of that fact.  To wash the slate totally clean is an ongoing process.

Once I was aware of the problem, I was able to resolve it.  Knowing that all my perceptions are illusory, that the past is past, and that all things are impermanent and changeable, I surrendered these attachments to past experience to my true Buddha nature so that I can be at one in the moment with these people in my life.  

Please note, I know that this is not an easy matter.  It took years of practice before I was able to follow my teacher’s teaching to surrender my ego, my learned experience, to my true Buddha nature.  Now when I come upon such an awareness, I know the way.  And undoubtedly this is not the last time that I will need to dissolve obstructions from the past.

Since that meditation I have observed my interaction with friends and family.  And I have seen that I am one with them in the moment and am relating to them directly without the intervention of thought.  How freeing that feels to have one more burden of the past removed.  But as with all movement on the path, this will have to be deepened through discipline and further meditation.



Another lesson in practical Buddhism.
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The Wisdom of Chickens

12/11/2012

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I live on rural land and have had a small flock of free-range chickens for the past few years.  I have received much joy in watching them go about their business ... endlessly scratching the soil in search of bugs to eat, eating grass, resting occasionally, taking mud baths, and always heading back to the coop as the sun begins to set.  

They are such good natured animals, always in a good mood, nothing disturbs them.  Regardless what the weather ... heavy rain, a snow storm, or howling wind ... they are out there doing their thing, although they are smart and take shelter more often when the weather is bad.  Even when they have had a scary brush with nature in the form of a hawk or other predator, while they may be very cautious that day, by the next they are back to their usual routine.  

But they are ever watchful ... one could say aware ... for they have learned from their experience.  For example, when they sense danger, they will stop what they are doing, sometimes making a low-pitched sound, until the danger has passed and then continue going about their business.

If ever there was a sentient being that was at one with all things, that experienced everything without the intervention of thought, that accepted things as being the way they are, it is my free-range chickens, and indeed all wild animals.  Animals in nature, as opposed to those controlled by humans, are perfect examples of the wisdom of the Buddha dharma.  

Of course the reason why my chickens and other wild animals have this grace is because they are not capable of thought.  They have brains, they experience pain and other sensations, but they do not have man’s ability to think.  An animal could not say, “I think, therefore I am.”  

The ability of man to think is thus both a blessing and a curse.  If you think about it, man has not made much of the blessing aspect of thought.  Although from a technology and intellectual standpoint, man has made tremendous advances using his capacity to think, most of that capacity has been used to increase his power over all aspects of nature, those elements of mankind who are less advanced, and those in his own circle, be it family, peers, or countries who he has viewed as either weaker or threatening.    He has not used his brain to free himself from the violence found in nature; he has not used his brain to create a peaceful world.

At his core, man thus continues to pursue the same patterns of behavior ... survival of the fittest ... as his wild relatives or the earliest cavemen.  But the power that he can bring to bear has increased exponentially.  Plus, man’s ability to think has given him the hubris to think that he is made in the image of God and therefore has the destiny and the right to control all other element of nature or “lesser” [weaker] beings.  He is not like the king of beasts, the lion, who kills what he must to survive but otherwise coexists with the rest of the animal kingdom peaceably.  Instead, all elements of nature and all lesser people can and must be made to serve his interests.

Now it is true that animals will become neurotic if they are treated badly habitually.  One sees this occasionally in the wild.  But it is only when animals come under the control of man, whether in factory farms or pets in their homes, that neurotic behavior becomes a frequent condition.  Animals may not have the capacity to think, but they are sentient beings and if mistreated habitually, they will exhibit neurotic behavior.  

In man, the treating of other men badly habitually ... whether within the family, the workplace, or in society ... has become endemic.  The tricks and games that man has at its disposal to exert pressure and control over others and thus compensate for his inner insecurity is the curse of modern man’s ability to think.  The result is a world filled with neurotic people and countries.  Forget about all the advances that have made our life “better,” this is the most universal impact of man’s ability to think.  

The phrase, “man’s inhumanity to man,” is unfortunately more reflective therefore of the norm of human behavior not the exception.  For it is not only the gross inhumanity that we need to be concerned with, it is with the small unkind acts that occur on a daily basis between most people.  Acts that are not in keeping with the Five Precepts, or indeed with the core teachings of any of the great religions of the world, and thus cause endless and needless universal suffering in man and everything that he touches. This is the curse of man’s ability to think.

So animals in nature are really our most abundant example of Buddha nature.  Why is it then that in the scheme of rebirth, being reborn as an animal/beast (whether in that form or human form) as opposed to a human, is seen as an example of bad karma?  (Note: being reborn as a hungry ghost or a depraved man is lower than being reborn as an animal.) 

Because animals were thought to suffer more than humans, both in their natural setting because of the misfortunes they were subject to, and certainly when they came into contact with man.  It wasn't because they were considered lesser sentient beings; the Buddha those living in the animal realm have been our mothers and fathers, et al.

For me, I don’t believe in reincarnation or rebirth.  But if I did, I would rather be reborn as an animal in the wild, or one of my free-range chickens, than as a man or woman sentenced to live in a cruel, neurotic world of man’s own making.


Another lesson in practical Buddhism.

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The Challenge of Staying Aware

12/5/2012

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Unless one is enlightened, staying aware throughout the day is a huge, if not impossible, challenge.  Even at an advanced stage of practice ... being aware of the illusory nature of all perceptions, the impermanence of all things, and having surrendered ones ego to ones true Buddha nature ... it is impossible to be aware every moment, to watch ones breath every moment.  

Why?  Because when we are engaged in a conversation or project, we become distracted from our awareness and our breathing.  Even though we may be present in the moment, we are not aware.  And it is at such moments that our ego will arise ... while I may have surrendered my ego to my true Buddha nature and it may not play an active role in my life anymore, it is still there.  It will always be a part of me, waiting for an unguarded moment when it can arise and gain a foothold.

And so, to give you an example, when I was talking on the phone with a friend today, the “fixer” habit-energy of my ego came to the fore.  I saw a potential problem in what my friend was relating to me and so I wanted to fix it, to protect him from having the problem.  That is pure ego.  It is not an example of listening deeply and speaking with loving kindness because such advice does more harm than good.  It communicates to the other person that you don’t feel they have the competence to figure things out, and that harms their self-esteem, whether it’s your child, a student, a friend, or an adult.  People have to find things out for themselves.

This is yet another example of what happens when one is not aware that ones ego is arising.  Immediately after this episode, I was aware of what had happened, but by then it was too late.  It may make a good teaching episode, but the question is, how to prevent such things from happening again.

I think the answer lies in being aware that this is a habit-energy of my ego and that it is not helpful or consistent with the Five Precepts.  In the past I’ve always told myself that I’m just trying to help someone, and how can that be bad?  Well it can be harmful.  And so just as in other “problem” areas of mine where I have achieved consistent awareness and if my ego arises, I am usually aware of it and can say, “no,” to it and allow it to subside, I must see this fixer habit-energy clearly for what it is.  I have been aware of this habit-energy for quite some time, but I have never been willing to call it for what it is.  I do so now.  I will meditate on this and strengthen my practice.

Another lesson in practical Buddhism.
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    1. The Goal Of Buddhism
    2. End Of Suffering Cheat Sheet
    3. 12 Steps On The Buddhist Path
    4. The Choice Is Yours
    5. You Have A Self But It's Not The Ego
    A Buddhist Trinity - Amended
    A Buddhist Trinity - Further Support
    A Buddhist Trinity - The Core Path To Peace And Happiness.
    A Carefree Day And Life
    Acceptance Courage And Wisdom
    Accepting The Life Of Those Around You
    Acknowledgement Of The Cause Of Suffering Is Key
    Allow Nothing To Disturb Your Peace And Happiness
    An Open Letter To President-elect Trump And All Americans
    Antagonist Or Challenge?
    A Path To Compassion And Loving Kindness
    Approaching The Other Shore
    Are You Reading And Willing To Let Your Cravings Go?
    As A Buddhist How Do You Plan - Revisited Again - Relying On Your Buddha Nature
    As A Buddhist How Do You Think About The Future?
    As A Buddhist … Revisited Again - Do We Need To Know Where We’re Headed?
    As A Buddhist ... Revisited - Planning Without Thinking
    As A Buddhist … Revisited Yet Again - How Do You Implement Moving Forward Without Having A Destination Point?
    A Simpler Path To Experiencing Joy
    Attachment To Self
    Avatars - Their Usefulness
    Back To Basics
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    Be Aware When Reading - Yearn To Please Or To Offer Joy?
    Be Careful The Monk/Teacher You Choose
    Befriend Yourself
    Being Aware Of Abundance
    Being Good To Yourself
    Being - Not Being
    Being One With Your True Buddha Self
    Being Present Is Being Flexible
    Being Present Is The Key To Peace And Contentment
    Being Present - No What If’s Or Imagining The Future
    Being Present - Part 2
    Being Present Requires Faith
    Being There For Someone
    Belief In You Buddha Nature - The Beginning And The End
    Be One With Your Divine Essence
    Be Sustained By The Love Of Buddha Within You
    Be The Eye Of The Hurricane
    Beware Complacency
    Beyond Acceptance
    Beyond Awareness
    Beyond Dispassion - The Next Step
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    Buddha Mind Free Of Thought
    Buddha Nature Gentle And Serene
    Buddhism And The Divine
    Burying Your Old Identity
    Can't Find Your Buddha Nature - Look In The Mirror
    Change Your Life By Changing The Direction Of Its Energy Flow
    Changing The Direction Of Your Energy Flow - II - Manifesting
    Changing Your Reactions
    Chicken Or Egg ?
    Co-existence Of Buddha Nature And Ego-Mind
    Compassion
    Control
    Craving "Survival" Condemns You To Suffering
    Crying - An Understanding
    Darkness Before Light
    Death And Life
    Death And Life - Part 2
    Death Heaven And Hell
    Deflating The Ego
    Dependence
    Desire - The Gerbil Trap
    Desperate For Love And Acknowledgment?
    Discipline - It’s Essential
    Dislike - An Insidious Obstruction
    Dispassion Does Not Mean Wtihout Feeling
    Dispassion - Enter The State Of By Becoming Aware Of The Emptiness Of Our Ego-mind
    Dispassion - Obstacles And Options To Achieve It
    Dispassion - Unlocking The Doors
    Don't Just Say No To Your Mind
    Don’t Waste A Moment
    Don’t Waste A Moment
    Do We Suffer Or Not? - The Choice Is Ours
    Do You Really Want To Be At Peace And Content
    Ego - Changing Your Relationship With It
    Embrace The Moment Not Merely Accept
    Emptiness - What Does It Mean?
    Emptying Myself Of Myself - The Divine's Will Not Mine
    Enter Your Buddha Mind
    Equanimity But Feel Someone’s Pain
    Everything That Disturbs Us Is A Product Of Suffering
    Everything You Need To Be Happy
    Evil - How Should A Buddhist Respond?
    Expectations? - Not If You Want To End Suffering
    Experiencing The Fullness Of The Present
    Facing My Insecurity
    Faith And Mind Not Separate
    Faith And Mind Not Separate - 2
    Faith And Reason
    Faith Even When You Are Dependent On Others
    Faith: The Essential Element Of Spiritual Practice
    Faith: What Is It And Why Is It Essential?
    Fear And Anxiety - There's More
    Fear Anxiety And Craving - Chicken Or Egg #2
    Fear Arises From Our Desire To Control
    Fearlessness
    Fear's Destructive Impact
    Fear V Common Sense
    Fear V Faith
    Feeling Lack - A Most Insidious Perception
    Feeling Off? - Adjust Your Attitude
    Finding Happiness In Each Moment
    Forgiveness - A Different Take
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    Freedom - What Does It Mean?
    Freeing Yourself From Anger And Resentment
    Freeing Yourself From Attachments
    Freeing Yourself From Fear
    Freeing Yourself From Fear II
    Freeing Yourself From Suffering - The Prerequisite Step
    Free Of Thought - Important Clarification
    Frustration ... Our Canary In The Mine
    Get Over Yourself
    Getting To Know Your True Buddha Self
    Give Yourself A Choice
    Going Through Life With Blinders - The Obstruction Of Labels
    Good Guys Finish Last?
    Go Slow
    Grateful For Being Alive
    Guilt
    Guilt And The Defensive Beast
    Happenstance
    Happenstance - Part II - You Your Buddha Nature And The Universe
    Happiness Is Elusive
    Happiness - What You Need To Be Happy
    Happy New Year 2017?
    Have Directions Not Goals
    Have Faith In The Process
    Have You Heard Of Narcs - The Final Answer To Why I Was Frowning
    Healing Your Inner Child - Healing Your Wounded Heart
    Healing Your Inner Child - Update
    Hell Is Just Resistance To Life
    How I Failed Myself
    How The Ego-Mind Tries To Destroy Faith
    How To Desire Yet Not Crave?
    How To Find Faith?
    How To Find Your True Self Your Heart
    How To Free Yourself From The Control Of Your Ego-Mind
    How To Live In Our World
    How To Love Yourself
    How To Observe Through The Eyes Of Your True Buddha Self
    How To Offer Others Joy
    How To Protect Yourself Against Psychic Attack
    How To Respond To Acts Of Aggression
    How To Spiritually Respond To The Election?
    How To Start The Day
    How To Surrender Your Ego Or Turn Your Will And Your Life Over To The Care Of Your True Buddha Nature
    Humbling Myself
    Humility
    Humility: The Truth About "My" Good Accomplishments
    I Am Being Reborn
    I Am Therefore I Am
    If Nothing Offends All Internal Struggle Ceases
    If This Is Practical Buddhism Why The Pastoral Setting
    "If You Love Someone You Will Suffer"
    Imagining In Meditation
    I’m Grateful To Be A Jubu
    Inner Happiness - Outer Happiness
    Innocence Or Ignorance?
    Insecurity - Nurture Not Nature
    Instead Of Forgiveness Show Compassion
    It Doesn’t Have To Be
    It's All About Survival - Or Is It?
    It's A Sin -The Harm We Inflict On Ourselves
    It’s Just The Way It Is
    It’s Just The Way It Is And It’s All OK
    It’s No Crime To Think About Oneself!
    Joy - A Hopefully Final Take
    Joy - At Last Real Understanding
    Joy - Experience It Now
    Joyful Dispassion - Excited Non-attachment
    Joyful Dispassion - Update
    Joy/Happiness - A Choice We Make
    Joy - One More Take
    Joy - Yet Another Take
    Knowing Best?
    Know Thyself - The Power Of Awareness
    Lack V Abundance
    Let Go - Let God
    Letting Go
    Letting Others Go Their Way
    Liberate Yourself From Thinking
    Likes And Dislikes - A Potential Trap Examined
    Listening - Why Is It So Difficult?
    Love At First Sight - NOT
    Love/Loving-Kindness - Defined In The Buddhist Context
    Love Yourself Unconditionally
    Make It Your Own - An Extension Of “The Heart’s Embrace”
    Making Lists - Objectifying Your Fears The Things That Push Your Buttons
    Making Peace With The Outside; Making Peace With The Inside
    Making The Most Of Every Day
    Manifestation - DANGER DANGER!
    Manifesting
    Manifesting In The Moment
    Meditation - Coming Home Releasing And Being At Peace
    Meditation - The Importance Of Daily Practice
    Memory - Don’t Trust It
    Mental Obstructions
    Mind Resting Undisturbed
    Mirror Mirror On The Wall - A Revelation
    Money And Spirituality
    My Daily Task
    My Daily Task - 2
    My Ego's Sneak Attack
    My Life - A Being Dichotomized
    My Meditation Isn't Working!
    My Mind Trapped Me
    My Road To Peace
    My True Buddha Self And Me
    Nature Of Mind Revealed - A Transformation
    Never Stop Going Deeper
    Newly Discovered Trauma
    Nirvana - It's Right Before Your Eyes
    No Expectations No Hope?
    No One’s Life Is Ordinary
    No Reason To Be Defensive
    No Self - Not!
    No Spiritual Force Can Protect You From Yourself Your Mind
    Not Engaging Your Thoughts
    Nothing To Prove
    Not Me - Peeling Off The Layers Of Our Ego-Mind
    Observe
    Offering Others Joy - From The Heart
    Offer Joy Experience Joy
    Offer Myself Joy!
    Oneness Does Not Mean Sameness
    Opening The Door To Being Present
    Our Over-sexed Culture And Lives
    Pain - A Cry For Help
    Paradise Lost
    Peace And Happiness Is Your Birthright
    Personal Boundaries As Part Of A Buddhist Life
    Preparing A Child For Life
    Pride Is A Function Of The Devil
    Problem - NOT!
    Proof Of The Nature Of Mind - Fear Ego And Buddha Mind
    Prosperity And Abundance
    Protecting Yourself From The Elements
    Psychiatry Needs To Incorporate Buddhist Teaching
    Putting Spirituality Into Practice 24/7
    Que Sera Sera - Whatever Will Be Will Be
    Real Clarity V The Delusion Of Clarity
    Reality Is Not What We Experience
    Receiving The Love Of Your Buddha Nature
    Reciting Affirmations
    Reclaiming The Narrative Of My Life - II
    Reclaiming The “Story” Of Your Life
    Reflecting On 75 Years
    Reincarnation - An Unorthodox Take
    Rejoice And Be Happy
    Rejoice And Be Happy - II
    Releasing All Desire
    Releasing All Desire - II
    Releasing Negative Energy
    Renouncing What You Have Always Depended On
    Replacing Weakness With Strength
    Reprogram Your Mind To End Your Suffering
    Returning Home - Returning To Your True Buddha Nature
    Right Attitude
    Ritual Burning Of The Past
    Safety Defined
    Saying Grace
    Saying “No” To Negative Thought
    Seeing The Light
    Seeing Through The Eyes Of Your True Buddha Self
    Seek And You Shall Find
    Seeking Guidance From Buddha Mind Not Ego Mind
    See Things Through Your Heart Not Your Mind
    See Yourslef And The World Through Different Eyes
    Self Re-examined
    Self-Responsibility During The Pandemic
    Sex - Misused And Abused - A Different Perspective
    Shall We Dance? - An Invitation To The Dance Of Death
    Shame
    Soul’s Yearning Distorted By The Ego-Mind
    Soul -True Self - And Ego-Mind
    Speaking The Truth
    Speaking To Your Buddha Nature/Divinity/Heart
    Speak The Truth But Beware
    Starving The Ego
    Step #10: Continued To Be Mindful Of The Arising Of Cravings And Desires And When They Arose Did Not Attach To Them And Allowed Them To Subside.
    Step #11: Sought Through Meditation To Constantly Improve Our Conscious Contact With Our True Buddha Nature
    Step #1: Admitted Our Cravings Cause Us Suffering And That We Are Powerless Over Them
    Step #2: Came To Believe That Our True Buddha Nature Could Restore Us To Peace And Created A Platform Of Serenity
    Step #3: Committed Ourselves To The Path By Practicing The Five Precepts And The Six Paramitas
    Step #4 Came To Believe That All Our Perceptions Are Learned - That They Are Just A Product Of Our Ego-mind - And That Our Ego-mind Is Not Our True Self - Instead We Knew That Our True Self Is Our Heart.
    Step #5: Were Ready And Willing And Made A Decision To Surrender Our Ego And Turn Our Will And Our Lives Over To The Care Of Our True Buddha Nature Opening Our Heart To Embrace All Aspects Of Our Being.
    Step #6: Came To Believe That We Have Everything We Need Within Ourselves To Be At Peace And Happy
    Step #7: Came To Be Free Of Our Cravings
    Step #8: Were Entirely Ready To Love Ourselves Unconditionally And Have Compassion For Ourselves And To Accept Ourselves And The World Around Us As Being The Way They Are Because It's Just The Way It Is.
    Step #9: Made A List Of Persons We Had Harmed And Made Amends To Them
    Stopping Self-Sabotage
    Strength Not Courage
    Suffering Is Universal - But Why?
    Survival - The Force That Controls Our Life
    Taking Pleasure In Each Passing Moment
    Taking Refuge In Yourself
    Taking Responsibility Is Not Blame
    Teaching Only Points The Way
    Test The Wisdom Of What You’re Doing Or Thinking Of Doing
    The 3-legged Stool Of Spirituality
    The Art Of Self-Nurturing
    The Challenge Of Staying Aware
    The Coexistence Of Ego And Buddha Nature
    The Devil Is Alive And Well
    The Distinction Between Pain And Suffering
    The Divine And Man
    The Ego As Saboteur
    The Emptiness Of Intrinsic Existence And Its Relevance To Global Warming
    The Felt Need For Acknowledgment
    The Five Precepts
    The Four Bodhisattva Vows
    The Fourfold Path To Freedom
    The Four Noble Truths
    The Freedom Of Focusing On Someone Or Something Outside Yourself
    The Heart/Mind Divide
    The Heart’s Embrace - More On Freeing Ourselves
    The Heart's Embrace - Updated
    The Hurt Of Rejection - Its Enduring Impact
    The Illusion Of Control
    The Imperative Of Self-Preservation
    The Lessons Of Siddhartha
    The Light Within You
    The Limits Of Rational Thought
    The Meaning And Power Of Selflessness
    The Middle Way - A Way Back From The Breach
    The Mind And The Wounded Inner Child
    The Mind And Your Inner Child - II
    The Mind Is Sneaky - Surrender It
    The Mind's Deep State
    The Mind - Suffering Connection
    The Miracle That Is You
    The Misleading Teaching Of No Self
    The Missing Noble Truth
    The Myanmar Situation
    The Mystery Of The Ego - An Answer
    The New Me - I Not I
    The Noble Eightfold Path
    The Original Trauma - Birth
    The Parable Of The Raft
    The Path As Tightrope
    The Path From Peace To Joy
    The Path Is Never-Ending
    The Power Of Affirmations - Use Carefully
    The Power Of Giving Voice To Thoughts
    The Present Beyond Us
    The Purpose Of Life
    The Purpose Of Meditation
    The Push/Pull Of Ego-Mind
    The Question Is Not Whether The Glass Is Half Empty Or Half Full
    There Are No Bad Persons
    There Is Nothing Wrong With You
    The Remnants Of The Ego
    The Serenity Prayer
    The Soul’s Yearning And How Best To Fulfill It
    The Stages Of Acceptance
    The Stages Of Man’s Spirit
    The Subconscious
    The Three Stages Of Embrace
    The Truth – Seeing It And Speaking It
    The Unaware Consumer
    The Wisdom Of Chickens
    The Wisdom Of Now
    This Is Not Me This Is Not My Self
    Thought Objects
    To Free Yourself From Cravings You Must Free Yourself Of Fear
    To Love Unconditionally = Loving-Kindness
    Tonglen - How To Approach Its Practice
    To Observe Free Of Mind - To Experience Joy
    To See Opportunity You Must Be Free Of Fear
    To Thine Own Self Be True
    Trauma
    Trauma Begets Trauma
    Trauma Denied No Longer
    Trauma - Healing It Is Critical
    Trauma - It’s Release
    Turning Your Will Over To Your True Buddha Nature
    Waking Up
    Walking Away From Modernity
    Walking On The Beach
    Walking The Path - It’s A Lot Of Work But It’s Well Worth It
    Wealth Poverty And Buddhism
    We Are All One
    We Are Not Meant To Suffer
    We Have Everything We Need To Be At Peace And Happy Inside Ourselves
    We Have Lost Our Sense Of Place
    We Make Our Own Mental Environment
    We Never Stop Healing
    What Activates The Ego-Mind?
    What Are We Celebrating On July 4th?
    What Blocks Me From Being Truly Present And Radiating My Inner Energy 24/7?
    What If The Present Is Bad?
    What Is Joy? What Is Happiness?
    What Is Life Without Emotion?
    What Is Most Important To You?
    What Is Your Task In Life?
    What Lies Behind Our Good Deeds?
    What Nourishes My Soul?
    What Price Peace And Happiness?
    What's In A Name?
    What's Real And What’s Not Real?
    What’s The Real Challenge - Life Or The Ego?
    What To Do When You Lose Faith?
    What Use Fame Power Fortune?
    What You Can’t Will And What You Can
    When A Heart’s Desire Is Commandeered By The Ego
    When Joy Is Not Joy
    When Love Is Not Love ...
    When Nothing Offends
    When Really Bad Things Happen
    When Smiling Toddlers Cry
    When The Mind Intervenes
    Who Am I?
    Who Are You?
    Who/What Is Your True Self?
    Why Diets Fail - A Buddhist Perspective
    Why Do We Crave?
    Why Is Being Grateful Such A Challenge?
    Why Is It So Hard To Be Free Of Your Ego?
    Why Is Mankind Trapped In A Box?
    Why Point The Compass Towards Tomorrow?
    Why We Take Offense
    Wisdom - What Is It?
    Wounded Our Ego-Mind Becomes The Devil
    Yes Virginia There Is A True Buddha Nature
    Yet Another Past Attachment
    You Are Not Alone
    You As Observer
    You Can Be In Control
    You Don't Need To Be Liked
    Your True Self And The Irrelevance Of The Min

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