Recently I was re-reading Seeking the Heart of Wisdom by Kornfield and Goldstein and in the chapter on deepening levels of practice they ask the question, “What makes the mind move at all? What is it we are trying to avoid by all this hoping, planning, fantasizing, and remembering? What pain or loneliness or unworthiness do we try to escape? …” The book then goes on to posit the various types of experiences or feelings that make the mind move.
But the discussion does not go deep enough, and so it misses the opportunity to state a simple truth. Behind each and every emotional reaction we have to the various experiences in our life, there lies at their core one elemental fact … that we are insecure. As I’ve stated in various posts, insecurity is at the root of the five hindrances. This is often the “elephant in the room” that is not discussed, but which needs to be understood to deepen our practice.
And how does insecurity come to be the root cause for each of us of all aspects of our samsara? Because we are almost from the moment of birth thrust into a world which makes us feel insecure, that does not provide the nourishment and love that a baby, then child, then adult needs. And as we grow older, we are constantly faced with experiences that tell us that we’re not good enough and that we either need to be more or need to have more in order to be up to snuff in our society, and even within our family.
Whether it’s fear, anger, greed (for money or power), lust, or slothfulness, it all stems from a deep feeling of insecurity.
“What,” the reader may ask, “about all these children today who are raised to feel that they are so special and deserving? Or the children of the wealthy? Why are they insecure?” For those who have experiences that constantly reinforce the feeling that they are good enough, that they are special, that they are better than others, they learn enough about the world that they know that there are many who would want what they have and that it only takes one slip to fall from the position they have. As the saying goes, the more you have, the more you have to lose. Also, the insecurity they acquired during their earliest years is always lurking in the background.
The antidote to this insecurity is the 3-legged stool that I described in a previous post … opening up your heart to embrace all aspects of your being and experience, being in a state where nothing offends you, and abiding in a state where faith pervades your mind. When we embrace our insecurity, it no longer offends us, it’s power to upset us and provoke fear or anger or whatever emotion is greatly diminished so that we no longer lose our balance like being hit by a strong wave.
But the discussion does not go deep enough, and so it misses the opportunity to state a simple truth. Behind each and every emotional reaction we have to the various experiences in our life, there lies at their core one elemental fact … that we are insecure. As I’ve stated in various posts, insecurity is at the root of the five hindrances. This is often the “elephant in the room” that is not discussed, but which needs to be understood to deepen our practice.
And how does insecurity come to be the root cause for each of us of all aspects of our samsara? Because we are almost from the moment of birth thrust into a world which makes us feel insecure, that does not provide the nourishment and love that a baby, then child, then adult needs. And as we grow older, we are constantly faced with experiences that tell us that we’re not good enough and that we either need to be more or need to have more in order to be up to snuff in our society, and even within our family.
Whether it’s fear, anger, greed (for money or power), lust, or slothfulness, it all stems from a deep feeling of insecurity.
“What,” the reader may ask, “about all these children today who are raised to feel that they are so special and deserving? Or the children of the wealthy? Why are they insecure?” For those who have experiences that constantly reinforce the feeling that they are good enough, that they are special, that they are better than others, they learn enough about the world that they know that there are many who would want what they have and that it only takes one slip to fall from the position they have. As the saying goes, the more you have, the more you have to lose. Also, the insecurity they acquired during their earliest years is always lurking in the background.
The antidote to this insecurity is the 3-legged stool that I described in a previous post … opening up your heart to embrace all aspects of your being and experience, being in a state where nothing offends you, and abiding in a state where faith pervades your mind. When we embrace our insecurity, it no longer offends us, it’s power to upset us and provoke fear or anger or whatever emotion is greatly diminished so that we no longer lose our balance like being hit by a strong wave.
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