Blog Archives

Half Measures Don't Work

7/30/2023

Regardless how dedicated one is to one's practice, we typically want to both keep living our lives pretty much as we are used to, but without the suffering, by being spiritual about life. It doesn't work, or better put, only partially works. An example of the old truism: you can't have your cake and eat it too.

After almost 30 years of disciplined Buddhist practice with daily meditation, I have discovered this truth. The reason why I, with disconcerting regularity, find that my mind (ego) has asserted itself and caused me suffering is that I have not renounced my ego and chosen instead to be one with my divinity, the child of the universe that is me.

Clearly, my ego-mind has been in control of my practice. While I have said that I empty myself of myself, I've said "Not me!" to my emotions, and surrendered my ego to my divinity, for example, and I had a clear spiritual intent in so doing, my ego-mind had other ideas and so those words became a rote recital with little meaning other than to make me feel good for the moment.

There is a reason why the Abundance Book says one must renounce one's humanhood (ego) and turn to God, Why Latoya Okela says you must empty yourself of yourself and seek the kingdom of God,

I do not believe in "God," but I do believe in the god that is within me, I do believe in the force of the universe that is in me. And so I now renounce my ego and claim my divine inheritance as a child of the universe, I now choose to be one with the child of the universe that is me.

Only then will I be sustained by the love of god within me. Only then can I feel that that love is the source of my supply, my substance. Only then can I truly rejoice and be happy, awake and be happy. Only then can I truly be aware of all the wonderful things in my life.

Through my years of practice, my life has much improved, for which I am grateful. As I've written, I am mostly at peace, my buttons do not get pushed, I respond to things with dispassion. And that is a blessing. But have I been happy? Not really. Have I felt unburdened? Not really. Have I truly felt grateful for all the wonderful things in my life? Not really.

So I have now, this day, renounced my ego, and chosen to be one with the child of the universe that is me, to be one with the divine presence within me. To truly say, "your will, not my mind's." And so I have been able to truly rejoice and be happy. I am truly aware of all the wonderful things in my life.

There's a saying in 12-step programs that "half measures avail us nothing." While they may get you halfway there, they won't be the home run that brings you home, In this case, home to your true self, your heart.

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The Mind - Understanding Its Facets

7/19/2023

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I have come to view the mind – that is the part of the brain that makes psychological or moral judgments and determines the actions that flow from those judgments – as being a long continuum. At the one end is Buddha mind. At the other end is the ego-mind. And in the middle it is a combination of these two aspects, on the one end of the continuum it is mostly ego-mind and very little Buddha mind, and at the other end mostly Buddha mind and very little ego-mind. (I have never heard or read of the mind being described in this way.) Scientifically, the ego-mind is mostly contained in the amygdala section of the brain, while Buddha mind is contained in the frontal cortex.

None of this has to do with the capacity of the mind to add and subtract, solve problems, etc. This capacity involves different areas of the brain.

In much of my writing, I talk about the mind and its impact. Sometimes I refer to ego-mind, but usually just mind. That is because in common parlance, the mind is synonymous with ego-mind; that is the "self" that everyone refers to.

So it is important to make clear that when in my writing I discuss all the problems that flow from the mind, it is the ego-mind I am talking about, certainly not Buddha mind. And the process of cleansing our mind, or purifying our heart, is the process of moving us along that continuum from ego mind to Buddha mind.

The mind, understood thus, is never your adversary, a source of problems; the ego-mind, yes, but not the mind as a whole. On the contrary, the mind is the source of growth, spiritually and otherwise.

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Don't Just Negate Specifics, Replace Your Total Frame of Reference

7/5/2023

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I have often written that when we discard or renounce some aspect of our ego-mind, we must replace it with something or else the mind will come rushing back in, since nature abhors a vacuum. Also, because the mind is just so powerful and deeply rooted in us.

I realized recently that this teaching applies not just to specifics but to my whole frame of reference. In the past, when I have renounced or said, "Not me!" to elements of my ego-mind, my habit-energy, I have replaced them with specific values or attributes. And I have said that when I empty myself of myself I am one with the child of the universe that is me.

But that has not changed my total frame of reference; it sounds like it has, but it hasn't. Because my ego-mind actually takes possession of these actions and turns them into rote.

So if my intent is to end my suffering by freeing myself from the control of my ego-mind, I must not only reconnect with my heart, with that child of the universe, and its qualities, I must do two further things. First, I must actively follow through and implement those qualities, the most important of which is faith.

How do I implement faith? I have learned that faith is not implemented by thought, by analysis. Faith is implemented by action, changing your habit-energy from mind-focused to one based on faith. So for example, instead of in the back of my mind being concerned, at times obsessed, with challenges that lie before me in the real world, I rejoice in my true self and am happy, I sing and am happy, and I awake and am happy. That is action based on faith. Awake here means to be aware of all the wonderful things that the universe presents me with every moment.

Second I must make a choice. There is a difference between saying "I empty myself of myself and so am one with . . . " and saying "I choose to be one with . . . " To truly be able to rejoice, etc., not just say the words, and to have faith consistently, absolutely, requires that I make an active choice to be one with my heart, to be one with the child of the universe that is me. That is changing my total frame of reference. And then to see that child/avatar as my guide throughout the day, everyday. Just like the Israelites had the pillar of fire to guide them through the desert, so I have my child of the universe.

This is taking me from one place and putting me in another. This action replaces a habit-energy based on the fear of lack with a habit-energy that is filled with the light and abundance of faith. This is my new daily practice which I implement throughout the day.. And it is bringing about a significant difference in my mental state. I am grateful.

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Know the Greatness WithIn You

7/1/2023

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I watched a video recently that made the point that people don't know who they are; they don't know the greatness that in them. Because they don't know themselves.

When I heard that I was immediately aware of the fact that I have never thought of myself as filled with greatness. Smart, yes. Intelligent, yes. Talented, yes. But not greatness. Even when I was in jobs or activities where my work was acknowledged as outstanding, even brilliant, while it massaged my ego, I never thought of myself as filled with greatness.

One of my first reactions to this message was, how do you reconcile the feeling of greatness within you with humility? I'm ashamed to say that I was thinking of greatness in ego terms. But when I realized that this greatness is spiritual, that it is an expression of the presence of God within me, the child of the universe that is me, there is no conflict because acknowledging that presence, saying "your will not my mind's," is itself an act of humility. See my post, "Humility - The Truth About "My" Good Accomplishments. "

Then last night, later in this same video, Latoya says you must seek the kingdom of God (she is a devout Christian). When I heard that, I realized that while I have sought to be one with the presence of god within me, or the child of the universe that is me, I have never sought to be part of the universe, which to me is the kingdom of god. And I understood that this is what I need to do.

When The Abundance Book talks about renouncing your humanhood and claiming your divine inheritance, I never knew what he meant by "renouncing your humanhood," but now I know. By seeking to dwell in the light of the universe, as a child of the universe, you must renounce your humanhood – the frame of reference for your life must totally change from your ego to the Buddha dharma or whatever spiritual system you follow.

And so as I go about my day today, I keep that image of the child of the universe before me, holding its hand, allowing it to guide me, filling me with light. I feel like I'm on vacation from my mind, entering a new phase of my life. If at some point I don't feel connected with that force, I need to ask myself, why, and redirect myself. This will be my task each day until my habit-energy has changed from being one with my ego-mind to being one with my child of the universe.

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