Despite all our work, regardless of the nature of one’s addiction, it never fully goes away. There is no cure in that sense. That is why the saying in 12-step programs is that one is a “recovering” addict, never “recovered.” Our cravings remain a part of our ego thinking-mind, even after we have surrendered our ego to our true Buddha nature and turned our will and our lives over to the care of our true Buddha nature.
Our ego remains a part of us, watching, waiting for a moment of weakness to assert itself. As you’ve no doubt discovered, your ego does not like not having its way.
Please understand that this does not indicate a failing on your part or a deficiency in your practice in any way. Even the Buddha stated that he was still aware of his thoughts, feelings, and perceptions, but as he was the Buddha he was able to just watch them arise and then allow them to subside. He did not engage them.
While you most likely will not be able to achieve 100% consistency in both being aware when your cravings arise and allowing them to subside, you can work towards that. Over time you will find that it becomes easier as your practice deepens.
As I’ve written in other posts, the first challenge you have is to be aware for as much of the day as possible. Don’t be discouraged that even when you stop during the day to focus on your breath and be present, a few moments later you become distracted and your mind carries you off. That’s just the way it is. All you can do is work towards increasing your awareness.
Then assuming you are aware of your craving arising, you have a choice to make. Do you follow the lead of your craving or do you with compassion tell it that it is a remnant of your past and that you are now seeking guidance from your true Buddha nature and will not follow your craving’s lead, you reject its guidance, knowing it will lead only to frustration, fear, anger, and overall suffering.
The choice is yours to make. And hopefully having worked the previous steps in this program, you will be firm in your choice not to follow your craving and allow it to subside.
For more help, please see the various blog and advice posts I’ve written on this subject.
Our ego remains a part of us, watching, waiting for a moment of weakness to assert itself. As you’ve no doubt discovered, your ego does not like not having its way.
Please understand that this does not indicate a failing on your part or a deficiency in your practice in any way. Even the Buddha stated that he was still aware of his thoughts, feelings, and perceptions, but as he was the Buddha he was able to just watch them arise and then allow them to subside. He did not engage them.
While you most likely will not be able to achieve 100% consistency in both being aware when your cravings arise and allowing them to subside, you can work towards that. Over time you will find that it becomes easier as your practice deepens.
As I’ve written in other posts, the first challenge you have is to be aware for as much of the day as possible. Don’t be discouraged that even when you stop during the day to focus on your breath and be present, a few moments later you become distracted and your mind carries you off. That’s just the way it is. All you can do is work towards increasing your awareness.
Then assuming you are aware of your craving arising, you have a choice to make. Do you follow the lead of your craving or do you with compassion tell it that it is a remnant of your past and that you are now seeking guidance from your true Buddha nature and will not follow your craving’s lead, you reject its guidance, knowing it will lead only to frustration, fear, anger, and overall suffering.
The choice is yours to make. And hopefully having worked the previous steps in this program, you will be firm in your choice not to follow your craving and allow it to subside.
For more help, please see the various blog and advice posts I’ve written on this subject.
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